11.7.14

T H I S  may seem a little more candid than usual because it is. I pulled this from my journal because it explains fairly accurately my life lately. I abridged it slightly, but only so others could understand my ramblings.

Entry from July 1, 2014:

Too much has been happening-so go figure I didn't want to write any of it down. Everything feels a blur and I feel distracted and increasingly inadequate. Lots of hard things going on. We moved out of the house by the water into our grandparents small house in town. That was a fiasco. But somehow (probably from a lot of help on high) we were able to get everything packed/cleaned/moved in a week and head off to AZ for the family reunion. It was fun. I loved seeing all our family together, reforming bonds, and being in such a beautiful place. Seeing my dear grandparents, visiting Mesa and meeting up with old friends. We got home after to find Grandpa Miller in the hospital. His health is bad, the Parkinson's has pretty much taken his mind and it's sad in a way but I also, personally, feel a lot of comfort right now. He headed with Grandma to a care facility this week. It's weird and Sequim feels different. I have hope though. I feel like Grandpa is closer to God than ever. He and Grandma pray all the time together. Maybe out of all this hard stuff there is some good. Bishop has been wonderful. He has been there so much for them and for us. He and his wife are amazing examples of service and Christlike love. Before Grandpa left he asked me to say the prayer. I prayed in my head that Heavenly Father would give me the right words to say to comfort hime and help him feel his Savior's love for him. I don't really remember all I said but blessed him with comfort and peace. I felt the spirit and I hope my Grandpa was able to as well. It was a hard good-bye seeing as I don't know if I'll see him again in this life. He told me before he was so ill that he probably wouldn't be around when I got back- but there is such comfort in knowing we are sealed together forever and that we will be with the Grandpa we know again because of our Savior, Jesus Christ.
I had the chance in Mesa to go to the temple with my parents, Grandpa Willis, Reid Grandparents, Uncle Rueben, and Aunt Erin. It was really special for me. My dream is to some day go through a session with all of my family members. I know that's not likely to happen and probably won't in this lifetime but there is such a strength and I hope to have that for my kids. What a great blessing it is to do the work for those who can not do it for themselves. I love the temple!
I love my Grandpa Willis. He is a neat dude. He reminds me of a weirder/cowboy version of my dad. He has mannerisms that remind me of myself. I was planning to go to church by myself the Sunday we were in Strawberry but my (sweet and super awesome) cousin Kylie volunteered to go with me. We get to church a little late and see Grandpa sitting there in one of the crowded pews. He seemed equally surprised to see us when we went to join him. After the meeting he asked if we knew he was going to be there, we didn't. But how neat we were able to sit in a wonderful meeting and take the sacrament along side our devoted grandfather. I thought that was so special. I have a deep adoration for that man.
I am so thankful to be a Willis. To be apart of this family, this line, this legacy. None of my ancestors were perfect, but they had faith and strength to press forward through adversity and endure. In my opinion, I think the Willis Clan gets better and better every generation (hehe). My Grandpa gave a small speech at the reunion that I'll never forget. He said: " Willis's are known for two things- We work hard and if we have our mind set to accomplish something we do it." And the best part, " And remember, you're a little different." (or something along those lines) I love my family. I feel their importance and closer to them more than ever. It's the spirit of Elijah touching our lives and the Lord uniting us through that spirit.
I feel the Lord in my life more than ever and can recognize Him and feel his support in amazing ways. But also I see the power of evil and can recognize temptations. My whole life is changing. I have already become such a different person in preparing to serve the Lord.
Really quickly:
My favorite two people right now are Lehi and Nephi at the end of Helaman (maybe now you are sensing why I feel so inadequate). They change the hearts of an entire people (the Lamanites)! They had the power and authority of God to preach the gospel. They knew that. So they did that and were able to surmount any obstacle that they ran into and convert a nation. Amazing.
Side note:
President and Sister Weaver came into the Diner for the last time with a bunch of missionaries. They are such beautiful people. You can feel Christ's love through them- it's tangible. They left me with hugs, encouraging words, and lots of love. I can't tell you how excited I am to meet my mission president and his wife!
Another side note scribbled up the side:
I think it is so neat that my Great Uncle Loren Willis also went on a mission to Argentina. None of my grandparents have served a full time mission (yet!) so it's like the next best thing. I am so proud of my parents who both served honorable missions and continue to be faithful disciples of Christ. They are incredible examples to me!
And just one more:
"And behold, in the end of this book ye shall see that this Gadianton did prove the otherthrow, yea, almost the entire destruction of the people of Nephi"- the power of one people! For good or for bad you are influential to someone! A concept I'm still grasping. As the quote goes: 'No man is an island'.

xx
t. 

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